Masthash

#funny

GhostOnTheHalfShell
12 minutes ago

#ClimateScience for everyone

Jonathan Pie Meets Prof Haigh | Climate Science Translated

5 min video

https://youtu.be/Xt3BK_JK3KE

Or how to explain it the rude British way.

#climatechange but #funny

I added a new section to the directory for odd and funny-sounding words.

https://dir.lordmatt.co.uk/esoterica/words/

#words #funny

Mordko
2 hours ago

Love it when a perpetual loser teaches everyone about “winning”. And when a spoilt millionaire who flaked at a posh school promotes “redistribution”. #Corbyn #funny #ukpolitics

DotardTed 🇺🇸 :verified:
3 hours ago

. #dNews #News #funny #dIrony

Graduation Ceremony!

Final exam at The Dick Cheney School of Gun Safety

Gull (Thomas)
4 hours ago

Fore! This seagull is ready to play golf, apparently. A lucky shot! #Photography #Funny

A flying juvenile seagull that is holding a golf ball in its beak.
Ivan Rodriguez
5 hours ago

What does a #truck say after it eats too fast? #Pickup!

#funny #joke

Ivan Rodriguez
5 hours ago

Why are some #Kia's so smart? Because you can Telluride to come pick you up.

#funny #joke

Heart of the wild, inc
6 hours ago
Things Jake Should Forget
6 hours ago

Forget it, Jake, it's Hollywood Hills West.

#bot #funny #LA

jlbdixon
7 hours ago

This is hilarious since only about 78,000,000 Americans have cable anymore. For context there are about 332,000,000 Americans. I'm mean seriously who brags they are number one in cable these days. Someone should tell Fox that it is 2023 not 2003. #funny #idiots
https://www.foxnews.com/media/fox-news-crushes-q1-cable-news-viewership-cnn-smallest-primetime-audience-key-demo-since-1991

Frankie ✅
7 hours ago
Frankie ✅
7 hours ago

Medieval Slap Competition

#funny #video

Jennifer Johnson
8 hours ago

There is a new escape room in town.

That location used to be a midwifery birthing center.

🤷🏻‍♀️Same thing, really.

#EscapeRoom #Funny #FunnyButTrue #Midwife #Childbirth

WACOCA
9 hours ago
Mr.Children, live funny scene collections.
Brian
9 hours ago
"Mini Dognuts $2.25"
Yahia Lababidi
9 hours ago

It’s not #thursday yet, but going through old pictures and wondering:

Where did all the time ago… 💭

#ThrowbackThursday #throwback #memories #time #fun #funny #photo #pictures #friends #love #joy #life

Cole Haddon
11 hours ago

SCREENWRITING TALES: SAY CHAD LOWE'S NAME THREE TIMES AND HE SHOWS UP JUST LIKE THE CANDYMAN

My most embarrassing — and funniest — story from my fifteen years working in the Hollywood TV/film industry.

Read here: https://fanfare.pub/say-chad-lowes-name-three-times-and-he-shows-up-just-like-the-candyman-a85cb5daf562

#funny #Hollywood #screenwriting #writing #writinglife #writingcommunity #amwriting

Jack William Bell
11 hours ago

Looks like Mr. Musk will be on Roko's Basilisk's shitlist.

> Elon Musk, tech leaders call for halt in ‘dangerous race’ to further AI research. https://www.rawstory.com/elon-musk-tech-leaders-call-for-halt-in-dangerous-race-to-further-ai-research/

#AI #funny

Jack William Bell
11 hours ago

Penn and Teller with a new take on the old 'doughnut and ribbon' trick:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nqWZRyhMTTM

#magic #funny #video

Matt Green
12 hours ago

New video:

Tackling Anti-social behaviour!

https://youtu.be/e9zyg8pr1vg

The Government has plans to tackle anti-social behaviour by banning Nitrous Oxide. But will this really help and is that even their aim?

#comedy #satire #sketchcomedy #funny #laughs #antisocialbehaviour #nitrous #drugs

PixiePancake
13 hours ago

Me after eating spicy food.

#Funny #Humor #LOL #Humour #Food #Hot
Source: Pinterest

A picture of a large, gray, wheeled trash container with two, huge, melted holes in the sides. The poster says: My neighbor put hot coals from the grill into the trash can.
DotardTed 🇺🇸 :verified:
13 hours ago

. #dNews #News #funny #dIrony

Don't mess with these chicks!

PixiePancake
13 hours ago

Somebody gets me.

#Funny #Humor #LOL #Humour
Source: Reddit

Me: Alexa, remind me to go to the gym.
Alexa: I have added gin to your shopping list.
Me: Close enough
Kit Irving
13 hours ago

Gmail: u sent that email to ur dad like a week ago... u wanna follow up?
me: no, gmail. I don't need a reminder that my dad is too cool for me, OK?! PLZ MIND UR OWN BUSINESS.

#parents #email #silly #funny #gmail #google

Mark A. Rayner
13 hours ago

Is that only when we have a question, or just a general principle? Will this be on the exam?

#existentialism #weirdsigns #exist #existing #philosophy #teaching #students #humor #humour #funny

Line drawn sign of classroom with simply drawn students -- one is just a shape in cutout lines, with a forbidden symbol on top with the text: Warning! Existing is strongly prohibited
How NOT To Make A Movie
14 hours ago

Come join us for our larger-than-life Joel-A-Palooza episode!

The crazy is larger-than-life! So are the stories and the laughs.

#film #cinema #movies #podcast #movie #filmmaking #funny #crazy

https://how-not-to-make-a-movie.com/podcast/joel-silver/

Ivan Rodriguez
14 hours ago

What do you call a motorcycle that's out of gas? Two-tired! 🤣

#funny #joke

Tyler McGee
14 hours ago

I love seeing him so deep in thought and watching the tiny floof gears turn in his noggin…

#Dog #DogsOfMastodon #Husky #SiberianHusky #Funny #Cute #AltText

A Siberian husky dog staring deeply into an elk antler figuring out the best way to chew on it.
Valente
15 hours ago

Me, arriving to a mastodon instance.

#funny #awesome #lifelessons😂

car crashing, auro chocando
LaffGaff
15 hours ago

This morning I met a man carrying a door handle.

I asked him why he had it.

He said, “It gets me out of the house.”

#funny #jokes #dadjokes

Chris Hallbeck
15 hours ago
[two people are talking]

Person 1. Hey Kevin! I’ve been looking all over for you!
Person 2. My name’s not Kevin. 

Person 1. Oh gosh! Sorry, you look just like him!
Person 2. No problem.

[a horrific monster that resembles a moldy rotten human-sized banana walks into frame]

Person 1. Kevin! There you are.
Kevin. Come on, let’s go. 

[person 2 is left to have an existential crisis by themselves]

Graphical Icons of Ambiguity

Gravity defying wine: if you can do this, you probably walk on water, or live in The Culture.

#ambiguity #icons #funny #SFF

Font Awesome “Sharp” graphic design icon of two full wine glasses tipped and touching while the wine inside defies gravity by not remaining level. Dark lines on light blue  background.
Farhad
16 hours ago

No one has seen him since then....


#Funny #Humor #Memes
The Joker
16 hours ago

What did the elevator say when it sneezed?
...
...
...
I think I'm coming down with something.

#riddle #fun #funny #joke #jokes

Stuart Longland (VK4MSL)
19 hours ago

Now there's what I call a "stuffed animal".

#possum #animals #funny

BUSTED… a possum chewed its way into a box of pastry tarts, gorged itself silly, then found it was too fat and lazy to make its escape.
Stuart Longland (VK4MSL)
19 hours ago

"Ringing the doorbell" is so tempting…

#possum #animals #funny

Inside a retractable hose reel… two possums have made themselves at home.  Just their tails sticking out.
Y U R E ii 💫
20 hours ago

If cats take selfies 🤭

#Cats #CatsOfMastodon #Fediverse #Funny #today

Patrick McHugh :toad:
1 day ago

@SecularJeffrey
True Crime, aliens, cryptids: The Last Podcast on the Left
Sex & relationships: Savage Love cast
Bad movies: How Did This Get Made
Movie trivia: Doug Loves Movies
NFL: PFT Live
#podcasts #SavageLove #funny

Brian
1 day ago
"Please...my son. He is very sick."
A forklift is holding a single fork.
Brian
1 day ago
Sign near door labelled "exit", but the sign on the door says "not an exit"
Farhad
1 day ago

The gooddesteboy ever!


#Humor #Cartoon #Funny
PixiePancake
1 day ago

I’d just move.

#Funny #Humor #LOL #Humour

A weather vane has been attached to a roof through the rung of a ladder. The weather vane will need to be detached to remove the ladder.
PixiePancake
1 day ago

Great. Now I have to build an enclosure.

#Funny #Humor #LOL #Humour #Animals

Post: Yes, autocorrect. I definitely meant to offer a monkey-back guarantee.
Evil Bunny Pottymouth
2 days ago
Karen Kaspar
2 days ago

Graphite sketch of a curious chicken I met, while I was on a walk. The chicken were peeking out from behind a weathered wooden fence around a cottage garden. They were looking curiously - or was it arrogantly? - at me, the woman on the other side of the fence, taking photos of them.

https://karen-kaspar.pixels.com/featured/2-curious-chicken-sketch-1-karen-kaspar.html

#MastoArt #art #AYearForArt #painting #FediArt #FediGiftShop #artist #ArtBooster #BuyIntoArt #birds #BirdsOfMastodon #BirdArt #nature #NatureLover #funny #animals #sketch #pencil #drawing

Curious chicken is a pencil drawing in portrait format by artist Karen Kaspar. A chicken is looking curious from behind a fence at the viewer. The chicken portriat is drawn with grey graphite pencil on beige toned paper with white highlights in the eyes and the beak.
PixiePancake
2 days ago

No potatoes were harmed in the taking of this picture.

#Funny #Humor #LOL #Humour #Cat #Cats

A darling little kitten is being held up making a big meow. The poster says: it’s dangerous to go alone! Take this screaming potato with you.
Mark A. Rayner
2 days ago

Very cute, very big, very weird dog, ruining it all by doing mime.

#bear #bears #animals #dogs #dog #dogsofmastodon #dogstodon #photomonday #fotoMontag #humor #humour #funny

brown bear sitting in grass, with all four paws up
PixiePancake
3 days ago

Change your identity.

#Funny #Humor #LOL #Humour
#Animals #Animals

An alpaca, with his head sticking out of a car window, is staring belligerently at the car behind. They cars are stuck in a long line of traffic. The poster says: I honked at the car in front of me and this angry alpaca popped out and now I’m not sure what to do.
PixiePancake
3 days ago

We’ve all been there.

#Funny #Humor #LOL #Humour

A man shows, then sits in a small leather/faux leather armchair. It looks like an adult chair but is sized for a child.
He says: Misunderstood my last Amazon purchase.
jared2876
3 days ago
jared2876
3 days ago
sezduck :clubtwit:
3 days ago

Steamed Asparagus

#humor #funny #webcomic

A giant asparagus is sitting in a doctor’s office, speaking to the doctor. “Damn it, Doc! Figure out why my pee smells funny!”
PixiePancake
3 days ago

As an ex-Californian, I can see both sides.
#Funny #Humor #LOL #Humour

Man checking out in line: Thank you! Have a good day!
*Turns to everyone in line: Have a good day everyone.
Random man in line: Jesus Christ, go back to California.
War and Peas
3 days ago
A four panel comic in line drawn style.

Panel 1: A person sits in an armchair reading a book beneath a lamp, next to a bookshelf.  On a side table, more books are stacked with a mug on top of them.  The person says "I've read so much."

Panel 2: The person looks up from their book and says "But lived so little."

Panel 3: They have gotten up to open the curtains, exclaiming "I bet a world of wonders awaits me outside!"

Panel 4: The person looks away from the window, deadpan.  Outside the world is on fire, aliens are attacking, there is lightning and in the distance an atom bomb appears to have detonated.
PixiePancake
4 days ago

I’m definitely the Denmark cat, unless it’s early in the morning.

#Funny #Humor #LOL #Humour #Cat #Cats
Source: Pinterest

Two pictures of white cats being rescued by firemen from burning buildings. The first cat is tiny, is being carried like a baby, and looks distraught and pitifully grateful. The second cat is huge, being carried securely at the firefighter’s waist, and looks like it is losing its mind. The poster says: Cat from Denmark vs cat from Russia after being saved from a fire.
PixiePancake
4 days ago

It’s only a matter of time.

#Funny #Humor #LOL #Cat #Cats

In picture one, the cat is hanging upside down from a doorframe with only its head showing. In picture two, the cat is hiding behind a chair leg in a very suspicious manner.  Poster says: I think my cat has been hired to kill me.
jared2876
4 days ago
dmartuk
4 days ago

It's always reassuring to see a meme properly brought to life

#silentsunday #sunday #meme #memes #funny #thisisfine #dog #dogs

this is fine meme in real life
Mark A. Rayner
4 days ago

Clearly, the main danger here is landsharks.

#sign #weird #weirdsigns #humor #humour #funny

a grassy field with forest in the distance and a sign in red letters that says "no lifeguard. swim at your own risk."
Roni Laukkarinen
4 days ago

This always cracks me up. #Meme #Memes #Funny

The beaver stands on a fence, magnificent scene behind it. The scream has been replaced with a human scream.

Congratulations, What We Do In The Shadows, season 1, episode 1. You have given me my first genuine, Irish whiskey up-the-nose, burning sinuses spit-take. All "spit takes" until this point in my life were merely shadows of what happened last night.

#WhatWeDoInTheShadows
#spittake
#bloodfeast
#funny

Photoshop Art
4 days ago

Sheep in the office. I recreated my old embarrassing work.
#PhotoshopArt #manipulation #MadeWithPhotoshop #digitalart #funny #art #Office #ram #sheep #3D #phone

cyberghost
4 days ago

Poor kid

#meme #funny

PixiePancake
5 days ago

I’m feeling almost catatonic.

#Funny #Humor #LOL #Humour #Cat
#Cats

An older woman is lying in bed talking on a landline. Beside her is a cat who is also reclining with only its head popped up above the covers to its chin. The sheets are hot pink and the woman is wearing a turtleneck and a cardigan. The poster says: Yeah, I can’t come out tonight. Super busy.
PixiePancake
5 days ago

Caution! ⚠️ Spy cat in training. ⚠️

#Funny #Humor #LOL #Humour
#Cat #Cats

A cat that perfectly blends in with the carpet on a flight of stairs. The cat is lying face up on the stairs, and it’s body is equal in width and length to the step it is lying on. The poster says:
Step 1: make myself look like a step
Step 2: have human trip over me and tumble down the stairs
Step 3: walk away like I don’t care.
Mark A. Rayner
5 days ago

Fellow toots! If you loved Everything Everywhere All at Once, and you're looking for more media like it, please check out Alpha Max: An Existential Romp through an Absurd Multiverse

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/58913529-alpha-max

"Snarky as Pratchet, insightful as Stephenson, as full of scathing social commentary as Swift or Voltaire, and weirdly reminiscent of LeGuin ..." –Amazing Stories

#existentialism #EverythingEverywhereAllAtOnce #books #book #bookstodon #bookreview #sciencefiction #SFF #humor #humour #funny

3-d view of the cover of Alpha Max, by Mark A Rayner. A teal background with handwritten titles and byline between slices of a stylized head with red hair and beard. (Galaxies can be seen in the slices.)
Chris Hallbeck
1 week ago
[a person is talking to their boss on the phone]

Person. Hey boss, I’m gonna be late to work. I’m having car trouble.
Boss. Oh, do we need to send someone to get you?

Person. No, I’ll figure it out or I’ll ride my bike today.
Boss. Okay, see you soon.

[a large robot that clearly can turn into a car enters the frame]

Robot. Sure, ride your bike. Or maybe call another Uber behind my back?!?
Person. You were giving yourself and oil change! I didn’t want to bother you!
Pamela Williams Fine Art
1 week ago

I'LL BE AT THE BEACH
by Pamela Williams

This really is so close to being true I can taste the salt air!

"I have decided I no longer want to be an adult... If anyone needs me I'll be at the beach building sand castles!"

#SharePamsArt👇
https://3-pamela-williams.pixels.com/featured/ill-be-at-the-beach-pamela-williams.html

#TheArtDistrict #AYearForArt #ArtMatters #Art #Smile #Mastadonart #FediArt #MastoArt #Smile #ArtBooster #buyintoart #beachart #beach #signs #fun #funny #humor #wallart

A coastal beach sign image with sea green background and red frame with the quote I have decided I no longer want to be an adult... If anyone needs me I'll be at the beach building sand castle!
Jason Stiff
1 week ago

When you're not sure what's going on, but you still want to help the team...

#dog #dogs #gooddog #team #teamwork #tugofwar #battle #funny #humor #Wednesday #dogsofmastodon #mastodondogs

PixiePancake
1 week ago

Check your husband’s ID immediately.

#Funny #Humor #LOL #Humour

Two men on an airplane who look uncannily alike. Similar weight, haircuts/hair color, skin tone, beards, and features. Stout, redheads with full beards. Poster says: The guy on the right is my friend’s husband. The one on the left is a stranger he met on the flight!

Hurdy Gurdy / Kraftwerk: Amplified medieval drone string instrument shredding through Das Model
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hKFDPd9jJI0
#foreveralone #hurdygurdy #kraftwerk #funny #music #+

Bastian Allgeier
1 week ago

@kaib Hashtag #funny

PixiePancake
1 week ago

When you suddenly realize that you have parasites.

#Funny #Humor #LOL #Humor #Dogs
#Dog

A dog with a rather uneasy expression and crazed eyes is photobombing two women on the beach who seem to be springing from his head.
Pamela Williams Fine Art
1 week ago

#Pigs are smart little creatures. They just need #love... just like us humans

#ART ✨HANG IT. WEAR IT. COLLECT IT
#ArtMatters - Share it with the world!

Please support Independent Artists we depend on kind people that support us! BOOSTS/FOLLOWS APPRECIATED!!

👇 #sharepamsart 👇
https://3-pamela-williams.pixels.com/featured/whimsical-pig-pamela-williams.html

#TheArtDistrict #AYearForArt #ArtMatters #Art #Smile #Mastadonart #FediArt #MastoArt #Smile #ArtBooster #buyintoart #pig #pink #farmanimal #animal #whimsical #funny #farmlife #mentalhealth

Whimsical photo digital art of a pink pig smiling with big blue eyes
WWarped
1 week ago

That's your motivational message for the day. You're welcome.

#funny

A motivational message written on the wall reads, when you are when you are tired stop don't stop done.
Mark A. Rayner
1 week ago
cup of espresso from above, and the bubbles look like a horrified face
War and Peas
1 week ago

What would your childhood say?

#comic #webcomic #warandpeas #funny #comicstrip #comedy

4 panel comic by War and Peas 1. Panel: A grown man with little hair walks down the street. He sees a tin can phone lying on the ground and says, "Oh boy, that must be my childhood calling!" 2. He holds the tin can phone next to his ear and asks: "Hello?" 3. Panel: A voice comes out of the phone and shouts: "You're wasting your life, you piece of shit!" 4. Two boys are standing on a roof top looking down. One of them says, "Wow, that one was easy." They look down at the man lying hunched on the ground, crying.
Brian
2 weeks ago
"This meeting should have been an email." - Oil on canvas
Mark A. Rayner
2 weeks ago

I find your lack of Guinness disturbing.

#stpatricksday #starwars #darthvader #leprechaun #humor #humour #funny

@jake4480 I'm sure they'd be even more excited if they could help you save $NaN!

#Funny

Screen capture of a Target.com checkout screen where there's an ad on the right side inviting me to apply for the Target Red Card because I've spent $NaN at Target and could have saved $NaN on my purchases with a Red Card.

In case you missed it, THE GREAT LIST OF EVERYTHING is back with a second season! 🥳
Follow our two wildly imaginative friends, Cathon and Iris, as they continue to share the histories of the objects around us in 13 new episodes. Watch now for free → https://bit.ly/TheGreatListEverything

An NFB and Éditions de La Pastèque production in collaboration w/ Télé-Québec & the financial participation of Shaw Rocket Fund.

#NFB #ONF #Animation #Funny #CanadianContent #CanadianFilm #CanadianTalent #Canada

Title treatment for THE GREAT LIST OF EVERYTHING with Cathon and Iris, season 2.
Alarmingly Bad
2 weeks ago

COMIC: Mondays

Galbor works in HR

#comic #webcomic #Galbor #comicstrip #MastoArt #funny

Alarmingly Bad comic where even eldritch horrors have rough weekends
War and Peas
2 weeks ago

Well this is a banger... "Freedom Isn't Free. Neither are Cell Phones."

Consider me incredulous that Patriot Mobile gets poor reviews. 😂

#WTF #Funny

Screenshot of a banner on the Patriot Mobile homepage that says "Freedom Isn't Free: Neither are Cell Phones" next to a stylized photo of the Iwo Jima memorial.
Mark Tillotson
2 weeks ago

A patron walks up to a librarian and asks, "Do you have any books on Pavlov's dogs and Schrödinger's cat?"

The librarian replies, "It rings a bell, but I don't know if it's here or not."

#Humor #Meme #Joke #Jokes
#Funny #Humour #LOL
#Science #Pavlov #Schrödinger

Mark A. Rayner
2 weeks ago

My favorite Ides of March meme so far.

#idesofmarch #caesar #history #humor #humour #funny #badtaste

portrait painting of Julius Caesar looking worried, with the caption above: Obituaries. Gaius Julius Caesar, popular Roman leader and author, dies at the age of 55 surrounded by his friends