Masthash

#funny

Nidonemo
36 minutes ago

Good evening, tonight's "Tea and Games With the Blue Fox" will be on time at 8:00pm CST, finally resuming our adventure in the cyberworld of Deltarune, chapter 2.

Only on:

https://www.twitch.tv/nidonemo

#Nidonemo #calmgaming #calm #relaxedgaming #smallstreamer #smallstreamers #Deltarune #RPG #RolePlayingGame #furry #furrystreamer #fox #foxstreamer #streamer #relax #funny #silly #comedy #sass #sassy

USLUCK
44 minutes ago
Tell your mom they're finally making jackets in her size
USLUCK
2 hours ago
Normal people make a snowman, meanwhile my colleagues:

Please follow me for much more memes. :3
Find the creator (and name them) in the Reddit comments.
Reddit Furry_irl
https://www.reddit.com/gallery/189jb4u
submitted by /u/WrongdoerDesigner15
Source: https://www.reddit.com/r/furry_irl/comments/189jb4u/furry_irl/
#furry #funny #furrymeme #meme #furrymemes #memes #reddit #public #bot

MemeTracker
3 hours ago

uhhh yeah ima need u to erase that rq

https://redd.it/1892rd3

#meme #funny #bot #reddit

yourdemonicfather
4 hours ago

The weird al effect is real.

#funny #meme #weirdalsweep #watchweirdrightnow

USLUCK
5 hours ago

https://www.usluck.com/130902/taxi-driver-didnt-realise-phone-was-connected-today-dont-forget-to-close-your-internet-tabs-folks/ Taxi Driver didn’t realise phone was connected today – Don’t forget to close your internet tabs folks! #Funny

Taxi Driver didn’t realise phone was connected today – Don’t forget to close your internet tabs folks!
regina
5 hours ago

There are a few aussies here leftover after AWS reinvent.

Tonight, I am showing them egg nog. It is the season, after all. 🎄🌲

Are you a nog person? #mastodon #funny #holidays

David August
5 hours ago
Criminal life hack: 
Wear extra fingers so photo / video evidence will be inadmissible as it will appear to be Al generated. 

[photo of a finger ring, a wearable ring that looks like an extra finger is above a real finger] 

[photo of a hand wearing the finger ring and so appearing to have an extra finger]
SilverSalmonAK
7 hours ago

I adore puns and wordplay. Here is one of my favorites:

There was this guy looking for the best hollandaise sauce and a friend suggested he look in Nome, Alaska.

When questioned why in Nome, the friend replied, "Everyone knows there's no place like Nome for the Hollandaise."

You're welcome. Carry on.

#puns #Alaska #funny

PixiePancake
7 hours ago
Dad hilariously laments having kids.
PixiePancake
7 hours ago

He’s not feline it.

#Humot #Funny #Lol #Fun #Humour #Cat #Cats

Husband says no room for more cats. Wife adds 6 circles to cat pic.
AaronDavid
7 hours ago

If you follow me, you have a sense of humour. If you're reading this, you're a reader. I’ve put this story online, free, gratis and for nothing, it's a twelve minute read. If you like it, maybe you’ll be curious enough to risk 99p for one of my short story collections. Maybe you’ll be smart enough to save some money by buying a compilation. Maybe you’ll be brave enough to buy my novel. Whatever happens, I hope you enjoy ‘Vincent'. http://aarondavid.co.uk/Vincent.html #freeread #shortstory #funny #pleaseboost

Grickle
8 hours ago

TODAY! Julián Nariño and I will be back doing LIVE drawing! Join us with your #grickledoodle requests! Starts at 5pm PT on my IGTV! https://www.instagram.com/grickle14/ #drawing #art #cartoon #funny #whale #knight #live

MemeTracker
8 hours ago
LaffGaff
9 hours ago

I never thought I’d be the type of person to wake up at 5 in the morning to exercise.

I was right.

#funny #jokes #dadjokes

yourdemonicfather
9 hours ago

If whiplash was an image.

#funny #meme

yourdemonicfather
9 hours ago

Extreme violence, avert your gaze if your a small child.

#cats #funny #meme

MemeTracker
9 hours ago

Google Deepmind AI VS Heisenberg

https://redd.it/189r3er

#meme #funny #bot #reddit

MOKANCAN.org
9 hours ago

LOL some of the names of the college 🏈 bowl games coming up: R+L Carriers New Orleans Bowl, Avocados from Mexico Cure Bowl, LA Bowl Hosted by Gronk, Famous Toastery Bowl, Scooter’s Coffee Frisco Bowl, Roofclaim(dot)com Boca Raton Bowl, Union Home Mortgage Gasparilla Bowl, Famous Idaho Potato Bowl, 68 Ventures Bowl, Military Bowl Presented by GoBowling(dot)com, Wasabi Fenway Bowl, Transperfect Music City Bowl #FBS #football #funny

Stef Isen
10 hours ago

Give a grown man a power washer...

#funny

Patrick McHugh :toad:
10 hours ago

When do you use moisturizer?
#poll #funny

Seeker (tm) (AI8W) ✡︎
10 hours ago

It's time for the annual posting of the perfect IT Christmas "Tree".

I'll write the first two lines of the song... sung to "Hark! The Herald Angels Sing"...

ARP the Cisco switches ping,
Sorting through the TCP!

(Someone else write the next two lines, and we'll just have some fun with it!)

#Christmas #Caroling #Funny #Fun

A stack of switches arranged to look like a Christmas Tree, with yellow ethernet cables going from one switch to another, and DVDs/CDs interspersed, along with other plug-in objects.
MemeTracker
11 hours ago
MemeTracker
12 hours ago

I can’t be the only one who’s thought this.

https://redd.it/189nxhy

#meme #funny #bot #reddit

Please follow me for much more memes. :3
Find the creator (and name them) in the Reddit comments.
Reddit furry_irl
https://www.reddit.com/gallery/1894hde
submitted by /u/Punkwolfen
Source: https://www.reddit.com/r/furry_irl/comments/1894hde/furry_irl/
#furry #funny #furrymeme #meme #furrymemes #memes #reddit #public #bot

MemeTracker
16 hours ago

True Nineties Kids Will Remember

https://redd.it/1896czp

#meme #funny #bot #reddit

MemeTracker
17 hours ago

“Han, ma bookie, baldo nee anna dodo da eena.”

https://redd.it/188ccns

#meme #funny #bot #reddit

Paranoid Factoid
18 hours ago

**CANNOT WALK IN STRAIGHT LINE.**

**DOES NOT GIVE PROPER EYE CONTACT.**

**MEOWS HIS WORDS.**

#caturday #cats #funny

Cat standing on two feet while police officer writes a ticket
PixiePancake
1 day ago

When you finally realize that life is a simulation and that you’ve been having technical difficulties.

#Humor #Funny #Lol #Fun #Humour #Cat #Cats

A cat looks pixelated standing behind multi-square beveled glass.
PixiePancake
1 day ago

I wish I had a bigger baster.

#Humor #Funny #Lol #Fun #Humour #Wish

A man regrets wasting 1 of 3  wishes on a giant 6 ft. chicken.
Grickle
1 day ago

The elves were having a hell of time wrapping John Carpenter's gift that year. #grickledoodle #thething #horror #johncarpenter #holidays #santa #cartoon #art #funny

History Shapes
1 day ago

Fishing for that taste of #summer? ☀️

Get the scoop on Ambergris Ice Cream, the stankiest treat from the #1660s 🍦

Read more:
https://www.historyshapes.com/ambergris-ice-cream/

An excerpt from The History Shapes Cookbook, a 24 page, full-color, illustrated and DRM free ebook. Pay what feels good ❤️

@bookstodon @histodons

#History #Histodons #IceCream #1600s #Ambergris #FoodHistory #DidYouKnow #DYK #TIL #TodayILearned #Illustration #Comics #Cartoons #Comedy #Funny #DRM #Ebook

A graphic recipe card for Ambergris Ice Cream. Terry, a yellow triangle, holds a soft serve ice cream cone as stinky waves waft upward. Next to him is a soft serve machine in the shape of a whale, with the spigot being the whale's butt.

Copy Reads:
Ambergris Ice Cream
England, circa 1660s CE

    3 pints of the best cream
    4 lbs. of ice, cubed
    1 cup of sugar
    ambergris, to taste

    Slowly bring three pints of the best cream to a low boil.
    Stir in sugar until dissolved.
    Add in ambergris to taste.
    Remove from heat and let cream come to room temperature.
    Once completely cooled, put cream into a box of silver or tin.
    Place silver box of cream in a larger tub and pile ice all around the sides. Cover with lid, ensuring all sides of the cream are surrounded by ice. Let stand for two hours.
    When cream is thoroughly frozen, scoop and enjoy.
USLUCK
2 days ago
I never knew that eggs contained egg. This changes everything.
MemeTracker
2 days ago

Some cars have annoying floodlights

https://redd.it/188509b

#meme #funny #bot #reddit

Jason Stiff
2 days ago

Friday is almost over, and Caturday Saturday is just around the corner...

#cat #cats #Friday #Caturday #Saturday #climbing #burglar #catburglar #funny #humor #catsofmastodon #mastodoncats

Karen Kaspar
2 days ago

For my friends in Europe - my watercolor painting "Two bunnies" is now available at Art Heroes (free shipping in many countries).

Für meine Freunde in Deutschland - mein Aquarellgemälde "Zwei Häschen" ist auch bei Art Heroes erhältlich (kostenloser Versand).

https://www.artheroes.de/de/motiv/Zwei-Haeschen-Aquarellgemaelde/1174983/132

#bunny #animals #cute #MastoArt #art #painting #FediArt #FediGiftShop #artist #InteriorDesign #MastodonArt #creativeToots #ArtForSale #watercolor #watercolour #pets #PetPortrait #funny #fun #happy #cuteAnimals

Mark A. Rayner
2 days ago
Old distressed wooden sign that says: Danger. Ninjas and pirates and lasers and shit
Nuclearpasta
2 days ago

My layouts offer precious insights into my process.

The full behind the scenes: https://www.patreon.com/posts/bts-4x38-4x39-92967870

#webcomic #wip #behindthescenes #layout #ass #funny #fantasy #patreon

Joy asks Landa something. In a discarded layout she was pressed against her. She doesn't respect personal space.
A soldier stops and questions a citizen. The sketch reveals that the soldier has a fine ass under his tunic.
Ingo Richter
2 days ago

I'm still waiting for it...
#friday #funny

PixiePancake
2 days ago
She says: I broke my leg in 3 places. He says: Don’t go those places.
PixiePancake
2 days ago

When the changing seasons cease to be magical.

#Humor #Funny #Lol #Fun #Humour #Birds #Bird

A pidgin is hit smack in the face with a large autumn leaf.
Grickle
2 days ago
myrmepropagandist
3 days ago

He was many terrible things, but when I found out he was a dead bootlegger too... I didn't think I could have any more contempt for the man... but now I do.

(Husband is the real dead head, but if you marry one you learn... he has been cracking up about this clip for 24 hours... )

https://youtu.be/aEmJlxYAxps?si=0zAFWgAH596rlLVb&t=1884

#kissinger #kiddingerDead #gratefuldead #gratefulHeIsDead #alFranken #video #politics #funny #bootleggers

PixiePancake
3 days ago

Cooking a holiday dinner brings you joy.

#Humor #Funny #Lol #Fun #Humour

Woman lying on the kitchen floor after a holiday cooking disaster.
PixiePancake
3 days ago

Cats are so low maintenance.

#Humor #Lol #Funny #Humour #Fun #Cat #Cats

Cat who saw kids on rocking horse meows until you rock her.
yourdemonicfather
4 days ago
Chris Hallbeck
4 days ago
Patient: Well, doctor, I've been having sharp pains in my neck when I wake up. Doctor: Do you sleep on your back? Your side? 

Patient: Uh, mostly on my back. 
Doctor: What sort of pillows- Oh no. 

Patient: What's wrong? 
Doctor: You have no neck! 

Patient: No neck?!? 
Doctor: I don't have one either! what is happening?!?
Kat ♾️
4 days ago

Here’s a good one from Scott Hilburn, The Argyle Sweater - because we could all use some #humor these days!

On edit: Corrected creator attribution.

#comics #cartoon #funny

Cartoon panel of a bartender, bringing a turkey a drink and saying “From the gentleman at the bar.” We see a pig with a beer at the bar waving at the turkey. The lower Contant reads, “The salacious origins of turkey bacon.”
Amici Nybråten
5 days ago

By Jim Benton

#funny #comic

A cartoon of a wizard and a cute lemon with legs and arms and eyes. 

The lemon stands in a summoning circle.

The wizard, looking at a scroll thinks: "Man, I hate cursive."

The scroll says: "How to summon a lemon", however, the cursive for the "l" in "lemon" looks like a "d", so "demon"
regina
5 days ago

Big hater energy from me on these web shit-cuts:

Copy and paste blocked (JESUS FUCK!)
Contextual menu blocked
Autoplaying videos (NOOOO!)
URL tracking parameters
“Get the app" popups (deep links)
Clickjacking (eat a dick)
Hyperlink auditing
Interstitial ads
Stupid JavaScript shit

Ok thank you this is my complaint for today #technology #funny #lol #web

Narayoni
5 days ago
"We live in strange times.
We also live in strange places: each in a universe of our own. The people with whom we populate our universes are the shadows of whole other universes intersecting with our own. Being able to glance out into this bewildering complexity of infinite recursion and say things like, ‘Oh, hi, Ed! Nice tan. How’s Carol?’ involves a great deal of filtering skill for which all conscious entities have eventually to develop a capacity in order to protect themselves from the contemplation of the chaos through which they seethe and tumble. So give your kid a break, OK?
Extract from Practical Parenting in a Fractally Demented Universe"
--A quotation from Mostly Harmless by Douglas Adams (The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series)
Chris Hallbeck
5 days ago
[A teacher is standing next to a student that is sitting at a desk.]

Teacher: Excuse me, there are no outside materials allowed during the exam! 
Student: Yes, it's okay because I've started a new diet. 

Teacher: You can't... a diet? 
Student: Yeah, it's mostly beans. Takes awhile to adjust but i'm doing good now. The hardest part was breaking the habit of a nighttime snack. I was never really hungry, just bored and using snacks as entertainment. 

Teacher: What does any of this have to do with your physics exam? 
Student: Today's my cheat day.
Alarmingly Bad
5 days ago

COMIC VIDEO: Killing It

Now with more fingerguns

#video #comic #alarminglybad #funny #interview #mastoart

Alarmingly Bad comic video where a man bombs an interview
Chris Hallbeck
6 days ago
Person 1: (Pointing)  Whoa, what kind of bird is that? 
Person 2: (pinching with an outstretched hand) Hmm, maybe a raven or— 

Person 1: Did you just try to pinch-to-zoom on reality? 
Person 2: I will give you fifty dollars to never speak of this again.
Frankie ✅
6 days ago

So anyone want to go with me to the festival?

#funny #festival

Sign reading

"Welcome to Pleasantside"

"Fingering Festival This Saturday 11AM"
Chris Hallbeck
1 week ago
[2 people are in a concrete basement. They look exhausted and injured.]

Person 1: Okay, I think we'll be safe down here. 
Person 2:  Listen to me. It's not enough. Love always finds a way. 

[a cracking sound is heard from off panel] 

Person 2: Run.

[A large heart-shaped creature bursts through the concrete wall.]

Love: Graaaaaaa!!!
Solinvictus :verified:
1 week ago

oh wow, when superstition beats logic; here’s what happened with the FreeBSD logo in a hotel

https://lists.freebsd.org/pipermail/freebsd-chat/2011-November/006642.html

#funny #linux #freebsd