#joke

Why did the fox go to therapy? It couldn't stop being out-foxed by life! 🦊😂 #pun #joke #foxpuns #animalhumor
https://punsteria.com/fox-puns/

Why was the dumbbell feeling down? It couldn't handle the weight of its problems! 🏋️‍♂️😂 #pun #joke #gymhumor #workoutfunny
https://punsteria.com/gym-puns/

Why did the chip break up with the cheese? It couldn't handle the extra cheese jokes. 🧀😄 #nacho #pun #joke #chipsandcheese
https://punsteria.com/nacho-puns/

You know you've hit your mark when your audience is slow crapping after your performance.

#crap #audience #SlowClap #SlowCrap #joke #humor #funny #dadjoke

I want to remind everybody I got this cartoon from a magazine called "Good Humor." #comics #really #joke

So my buddy thought it'd be a good idea to get an inspirational tattoo on his forehead...
Boy, was his face read.
#joke #jokes

Why do flamingos always lift one leg? Because if they lifted both, they'd fall! 😆 #pun #joke #flamingo #birdhumor
https://punsteria.com/flamingo-puns/

#minchiate #daridere #joke #themazzarella

#Bugs #Wildlife #Joke

#Space #Joke

Misheard lyrics?

I think not! 😉

😂

Moody Blues - Nights in White Satin

https://song.link/i/1452558806

#Rock #RockMusic #ClassicRock #Music
#Humor #Meme #Joke #Jokes
#Funny #Humour #LOL

Why did the berry go to school? To become a b'aca'demiac! 🍓🎓 #pun #joke #berryfunny #fruitpuns
https://punsteria.com/berry-puns/

When someone tells you that they cut their own hair, it's polite to act surprised
#joke #jokes

Fun fact 🤪

#VinDiesel #TheFastAndTheFurious #silly #joke

😜

#programming #joke

Why do babies always carry a binky? Because they're the paci-FIERCEST creatures around! 😂👶 #pun #joke #babyhumor #parenting
https://punsteria.com/baby-puns/

the puff adder: actually just spicy xor and some hot air

#xor
#logicGate
#joke

Where do you find a one legged cow?
Wherever you left it, it's not going anywhere.
#joke #jokes

Why did the gardener plant a seed in the pond?

To grow a water-melon.

#joke

Why do candles make bad detectives? They always burn out before the case is solved! 😂🕯️ #pun #joke #candlehumour #lightenup
https://punsteria.com/candle-puns/

I was meant to be looking after my friend's valuable painting but it's been stolen, and I haven't the art to tell him

#LunchPun #Pun #Joke

Two fish are sitting in a tank.
One says to the other, "How on Earth do you drive this thing?!?"
#joke #jokes

Why don't skiers have any jokes? They're always going downhill! 🎿😂 #pun #joke #skiing #winterfun
https://punsteria.com/ski-puns/

Why do hikers always have a great sense of humor? Because they find every trail hill-arious! 😄⛰️ #pun #joke #hiking #outdoorfun
https://punsteria.com/hiking-puns/

I think instead of "LOL"....
I'm gonna go with "SALTS" (Smiled a little then stopped). Its more truthful.
#joke #jokes

You know what....😉🙄🤭🤪😂.

I've been a bad girl....
Now that sounds kind of wrong again....🤦🏼‍♀️😂

Anyway....the fun counts....

Since I read last night at the big birdie the nonsense he writes under his name....

Well and I couldn't leave it alone, nobody reads over there my things anyway, but you here my dears!

I'm still laughing....
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

#twitter #fun #joke #elonmusk #laugh

Happy Monday! #joke

Why did the mustache get a promotion? Because it always stayed a hair above the rest! 😄 #pun #joke #mustache #hairlarious
https://punsteria.com/mustache-puns/

Why did the butterfly get a job as a bartender? Because it wanted to serve a little nectar! 🦋🍹 #pun #joke #butterflyhumor #justforlaughs
https://punsteria.com/butterfly-puns/

Why did the brain go to art school? It wanted to learn how to cerebellum canvases! 🖼️🧠 #pun #joke #BrainyLaughs #ArtisticMinds
https://punsteria.com/brain-puns/

Sunday Financial Humor

#humor #fun #joke #money #finance #stevenwright

Why do alpacas always seem well-dressed? They're experts at alpaca-ing their suitcase! 🧳😂 #pun #joke #alpacas #fashionistas
https://punsteria.com/alpaca-puns/

@phranck die Preise sprechen fuer sich ;) #fun #joke

"i'm really more of a dog person." -- werewolf
#joke #jokes

Science called.

Bad news.

The earth doesn't revolve around you.

😂

#Humor #Meme #Joke #Jokes
#Funny #Humour #LOL
#ScienceJokes #DadJokes

Lettuce romaine calm - no salad can toss my sense of humor away! 🥗😂 #pun #joke #saladpuns #foodhumor
https://punsteria.com/salad-puns/

**BREAKING NEWS**
Previously unknown stages of the Life Cycle of the Gummy Bear have been discovered; the Egg and Larval forms have been discovered!

#candy #joke #comedy #nature

Didn't expect that....

🎥 by lnspltblvd

#motorcycle #bobberbrothers #custom #bobber #bikers
#biker #ride #bobberstyle #build #garage #customized #respect #freedom #bobbershit #bikelife #joke #fun

When I go to the movies alone, I take a clipboard so everyone thinks I'm a professional movie reviewer and not an awkward friendless loner.
#joke #jokes

Why did the hockey player become a gardener? Because they knew the ice was no place to "puck" around with plants! 🏒😆 #pun #joke #hockey #gardening
https://punsteria.com/hockey-puns/

What is the proudest body part?
The veins
#joke #jokes

What keeps the ocean from leaking?

The seals.

#joke

[In text:]

"I am a canker survivor."

"Er... surely you meant cancer survivor?"

"No, I had a canker and I survived it."

"Then I shall dub you an idiot."

#cancer #CancerSurvivor #idiot #canker #joke #humor #funny #dadjoke

I caught a big fish!
I was going to mount it, but there were people around!

- Emo Philips
#joke #jokes

Henry Kissinger's position

#ukraine #russia #Europe #geopolitics #joke #politics

@countcol Follow @countcol for the very latest in dieting tips!
#humor #joke #jokes

I hate autocorrect... It always makes me say things I don't Nintendo.
#joke #jokes

How do you make holy water?
You take ordinary water and boil the hell out of it.
#joke #jokes

So what have *you* been up to?

#Humor #Meme #Joke #Jokes
#Funny #Humour #LOL #Embarassed #Autocorrect

Why didn't the sun have to attend university?
It's already got thousands of degrees.
#joke #jokes

Why is it important to have plenty of help when changing a light bulb? Many hands make light work.
#joke #jokes

당사자성 발언입니다 #mood #joke

Him: I bet you like arguing pedantic semantics.

Me:

Me: That’s not *precisely* correct.

#Humor #Meme #Joke #Jokes
#Funny #Humour #LOL #DadJokes

Which peppers are the most musical?

Bell peppers.

#joke

Bill Gates walks into a bar and everyone inside becomes a millionaire
...on average.
#joke #jokes

The answer is "maybe“ but said with pride.

I’m proud of this shitpost.

Info regarding yesterday’s raffle:
There have been exactly 6 participants. So everybody who replied, wins.

Congrats to:
Mad kiwi and Artuniverse01 on twitter
Stupity and Alienwarek on Furaffinity
SpitzyTheClown and JackOTerrier on Deviantart

#furry #furryart #furryartwork #anthro #digitalart #comic #joke #kiwi #bat #fruit #fruitbat #pun #shitpost #meme #LGBTQIA #pridemonth

What do you get when you mix an elephant and a rhino?
'ell if I know!

(elephino)
#joke #jokes

LinkedIn is the backwards Tinder.

A lot of attractive women are contacting nerds and get ghosted by them 😆

#joke #funny #fun #humor

What should you do if you see a spaceman?
Park in it, man.
#joke #jokes

Just found out you can eat a big turkey dinner whenever you want without having to be thankful. This changes everything.
#joke #jokes

"#Doctor, I cannot #fart."

"You suffer from afartasia. Shove this #gas up your butt three times a day. Call me if the situation does not improve."

[3 weeks later.]

"Doctor, the situation improved. Friends and family have left me because of the #smell, however."

#PhysicalHealth #joke #humor #funny #dadjoke

When people say "surreal" they mean "real", it's just most of your life is not very real, just repetition and routine.
#joke #jokes

"If a turtle doesn’t have a shell, is he homeless or naked?" — George Carlin — — — #GeorgeCarlin #quote #quotes #joke #homeless #naked #turtle #humor #humorous

- In Somalia, you're always given a napkin with your chocolatey coffee
- Mocha tissue?
- Not just in the capital, all over the country

#LunchPun #Pun #Joke

My friend is an excellent unicyclist but socially awkward when going out.

They can't handle bars.

#joke

If they haven't named that marvelous wooden vessel yet, might I suggest "The Luggage"?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rincewind#The_Luggage

#TerryPrachett fans will get the #joke 🤓🧙‍♂️📦

#1001badjokes and #puns 180: A #lefthanded #joke 🙂
https://youtube.com/shorts/Gx0OVPUQdlg?feature=share

Dear #fbi

#joke #meme #pride #pridemonth #security

So the plan today is to show Pretty Impala my "new water heater" and then maybe she'll let me play with her "huge tracts of land."

(Yes, yes, I'm joking but I really got a new water heater. Don't tell her! She does not know.)

#MontyPython #MontyPythonAndTheHolyGrail #HugeTractsOfLand #WaterHeater #joke #funny #humor

I complained at the school board meeting that the middle school band concert included sax and violins
#pun #joke #nerlingersjokes

Image description: Puppet monkey meme looking sideways, and then straight ahead. In front of sideways-monkey there is a double slit experiment with a waveform phase interference pattern. In front of look ahead-monkey there is a double slit experiment with a particle phase pattern

#quantumphysics #joke

How many tennis players does it take to change a light bulb?

None.

They all say, “What do you mean it was out? It was in!”

#joke

A bison appeared in a nudist camp and everyone shouted 'A buff hello!'

#LunchPun #Pun #Joke

Software developers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own.

😊 ...

#joke #pyjoke #python #fedijoke #fediprogramming

When wanted criminals go to the #vet for medical issues, do they also go to the #dog #groomer for a #haircut? 😁

#joke #silly

I was at a restaurant and each bathroom had ten people waiting to get in. I didn't realize that in 2023 they still have potty lines. #Joke

Sorry, #joke works only in #german .

Haven't we all?

#Dorothy #Alice #WeirdShit
#Humor #Meme #Joke #Jokes
#Funny #Humour #LOL

Which Canadian city is a tree’s favorite?

Montreeal.

#joke

My French girlfriend left me over my refusal to pronounce French words in a French accent. I call it an act of de-fiance.

#LunchPun #Pun #Joke

Did you hear about one flower who went on a date with another flower?

It's a budding romance.

#joke

How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across.

#joke

Rose are Red
Violet are Bluue
Unexpected error on line two

#bug #mistake #joke #debug #dev

What did the birder say when they mistook an eagle for a hawk?

This is hawkward.

#joke

My fear of roses is a thorny issue.

I’m not sure what it stems from, but I’m stuck with it.

#joke

What blood type does a man with bad spelling have?
Typ-o
#joke #jokes

如此黑客
"Hacker"

#lulz #joke
@board@gup.pe @worldboard
@board@ovo.st

I'm selling my bike.

One interested buyer asked what's the lowest I'd go.

I replied, "About two miles per hour, otherwise you'll tip over."

#joke

My WD-40 can rusted.
Now that's irony.
#joke #jokes

I worked on unclogging the tub for nearly an hour.

Now I feel drained.

#joke

Einen schoenen T-Shirt print. #fun #joke #it #electronic

I'm interested in corduroy pillow cases.

They’ve been making headlines.

#joke

When we were kids, my siblings and I would race to put our shoes on every morning.

It always ended in a tie.

#joke

Gotta love a cumulative vertical signage joke.

From Give Me A Sign on Facebook.

#Joke #Sign #Signs #Advert #Street #Pole

@judy2k It’s one of my favorite fruits, please don’t destroy it for me. 😅

#joke

I was taking the road out of the city the other day when someone told me to put it back.

#joke

"I can't go on a diet right now. I have too much on my plate."

From https://omny.fm/shows/daily-dad-jokes-1/my-wife-accused-me-of-being-immature-i-told-her-to
#joke

Breaking: Due to a slump in the toy industry, Santa Claus is going into the potato chip delivery business. To show he's in it for the long haul, he has officially changed his name to Crisp Pringle. #Joke

Why did the basketball team join a craft club?

They wanted to learn how to make baskets.

#joke

#hankandboats #watercolour #cartoon #dogsofmastodon #dadjoke #knockknock #joke

TIL about Magic 8 ball aka simplified ChatGPT

#AI #TIL #joke

How do you get a giraffe in a refridgerator?

Open the door and take out the penguins.

#joke

Why did the teacher draw on the window?

They wanted their lesson to be very clear.

#joke

When the floodwaters receded, Noah turned to all of the animals and said: "go forth and multiply!" - and every sort of animal ran and slithered and galloped off of the ark to go repopulate the planet.

When the dust cleared, Noah looked around and saw that the only critters left were two little snakes. "What are you waiting for?" he said. "Go multiply!"

"We can't!" replied the snakes. "We're adders."

#joke #pun

What kind of dance was the frog prince best at?

Hip hop.

#joke

Why did the bird visit the library?

It was looking for bookworms.

#joke

Is your refrigerator running? Because I'd rather vote for it than the existing candidates.

https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-daily-dad-jokes-89110830/episode/why-cant-former-president-trump-be-115109515/
#joke

Why are plants bad cheerleaders?

Because they only root for themselves.

#joke

I wasn’t all that interested in gardening.

But I planted a few seeds, and it grew on me.

#joke #gardening

How do you talk to a bunch of pine trees all at once?
On a coniference call.

#joke

What bird movie won an Oscar?

Lord of the Wings.

#joke

Why did the robber jump in the shower?

They wanted to make a clean getaway.

#joke

From the Classic Art memes group in another place. Made I laugh. :-)

I usually follow back boosters and those that are in similar brain spaces.

#Meme #Medieval #Classical #Tapestry #Lettering #Joke

Which rock band is a favorite among owls?

The Hoo.

#joke

What’s the best way to watch a fly-fishing tournament?

Live stream it.

#joke